Hey love, I won't hurt you.

It's snowing again! And that exclamation point isn't because I'm happy about it. It's more of an angry "!"...can you blame me? It snows everytime the snow we *just* had melts away. And all this snow makes my commute really sucky. Uber sucky. Only because I have to take an earlier train so I don't get delayed and miss class. I love being in Manhattan but I cannot wait for nicer weather! That exclamation point was meant to be happy. I want to be able to walk around a bit (and not just because I took the express 6 train or the wrong 6 train downtown and wind up on 33rd street). I'd like to visit Central Park and go running though I'm not sure what to do with my books. I guess I'll duct tape them to my chest and ankles and use them as extra weights? The thing about not having a car or a dorm room is that you can't put shit in it when you want and take it out when you need it. My life is a struggle, I know.

I made a new workout schedule. I workout six times a week and at the end of every two weeks, I weigh myself. And (my favorite part), if I complete all workouts at the end of two weeks, I get to treat myself to something. Whether it be lotion, underwear, chocolate. I don't know. My point in mentioning this is that part of my workout routine includes going outside to walk around the block five or six times. Aaaaaaaaaaand this fucking God damn snow makes it VERY difficult to do. For instance, I wanted to walk around the block and go running today but noooooo God has dandruff again. I mean, I did pilates instead and I loved it because it stretches me out. I didn't realize how stiff I was until I started doing the video. And I know I'm making progress because it isnt as hard to complete as it was when I first put the DVD into the slot. I can do some moves a bit better and I can do more of the moves straight through without having to pause every seven minutes. So kudos to me for not sucking. So yeah, tomorrow I'm gonna do pilates again because the snow is not letting up. I love doing pilates in the morning after I wake up because it gives me a good stretch. I sound like a rambling idiot now.

The fish died. Guess I'm not so surprised but it wasn't the fish I expected. The most mobile one of the two croaked. I saw him on his side this afternoon after Melany left the house and I freaked out. I couldn't look in that direction for about fifteen minutes (which made pilates very difficult when I had to rotate my head). Poor fishies. The other is sick and can't swim very well, if at all. And they are *my* responsibility so, in essence, my pets are gone. I want a dog so badly. I can't stand it.

I'm contemplating changing my major to anthropology. I know that I have to consider more than just "oh, that's cool" when determining my future but it may be a good fit. I could minor in anthropology, too. But I like the idea of being an anthropologist, studying people. To have superior knowledge about a certain group of people because I lived amongst them for years is awesome, challenging and fun. As an anthropologist I have more chance of traveling and seeing things than I do as a psychologist. Right? It's all a thought. I just think I'm so set on studying psychology that anything else is stupid. Don't listen to me.

I do not know what I'm doing with myself anymore. Care to join the club?




If I don't get some shelter
I'm gonna fade away.