Your love is gonna drown

I loathe sports fans on Wednesday nights. I don't get on the train until after 10pm but it hasn't failed yet that the train is always packed on Wednesday nights because of sports. And right now it's fucking hockey. I have no problem with hockey. I like that it is an alpha underdog sport with a huge but not absurd following. There are still a lot of hockey fans (apparently) and I happen to know a handful. Good for them. Really. But FUCK the people who go to the Wednesday games and take up all the seats on the train. I know the train can sit a lot of people, okay. I'm not an idiot. But there were people standing for pretty much their whole ride last night because it was that packed with obnoxious and happy Rangers fans and quiet Islanders fans. I get it, your team won and you're proud of it. But is it necessary to shout and cheer every five minutes about how amazing the Rangers are? I don't think so...it's not like they are changing the universe, here. And if they are, please forgive me, Ranger God. But what really annoys me about this whole sports thing on Wednesday nights is the fact that people bolt to the tracks once they are announced on the board. I don't mean rush. I don't mean run. I mean bolt. I mean the very second the two numbers appear on the screen next to the Ronkonkoma train, they are already half way down the fucking stairs, screaming the track number several times, often with child in hand--or nearby--or lost in the swarm of people. Explain to me what the point of this is? I mean, yeah, getting a seat is nice. But I have never seen sooo many people obnoxiously get to the train first. And it starts a frenzy because others see the people in front run, so they think they have to run as well. And the parents yell at their children to run faster in the crowd and keep up with them. Boyfriends yell at their girlfriend (or closet boyfriends) to hurry the fuck up. It's insane. And all to get to a seat first. As previously mentioned, there are plenty of carts. what the fuck is the rush? You're all assholes, hockey fans from last night. Your effort to look like a complete asshole paid off. Taking pictures in your jerseys in Penn Station, drinking beers from Penn Station and talking about how awesome your team is...and what was gross was sharing a bench with this Rangers fan last night. He was a bigger guy so his hip was touching mine the ENTIRE trip. Lucky me his stop was also Ronkonkoma...just like everyone else in my cart, apparently. And it was awkward talking on the phone with my boyfriend while this guy was obviously listening in on our philosophic conversation (Ryan likes to believe we have free will, while I'm a determinist...don't ask) as well as the other things we talked about. And his hip was touching me. His sweaty, warm hip. And I felt gross whenever he moved and I realized just how warm his hip was once I felt the cooler air. And as we got closer to the Ronkonkoma train station, he didn't get up untl the train stopped which pissed me off because I had to feel his damn hip the whole time and his hip moving so I could feel just how warm it was in comparison to the cooler air. So, fuck him too. And when the crazed animals exited the train, they ran to their cars, because obviously their cars are going somewhere, and there may not be space in them. And it was very unsafe, it drizzling out, the roads wet, and crazed and apparently high hockey fans running in circles getting to their vehicles (probably a Ford or a gas guzzling SUV to fit the overweight adults and/or children whom only watch hockey and talk about hockey, but would never dare to pick up a stick and play and actually lose the beer belly or McDonald's Happy Meals just wasting away in their stomachs). I was so annoyed. Can you tell?