To the left (and so on)

I miss hands on me because you can feel how much someone cares about you by the ways they touch you. Arms too. When someone hugs you lightly they are either too afraid or don't love you lots. A tight, squeezing, warm hug means that the other person loves you and they'll miss you, or they're always there for you. And I miss those things. I have friends and I have family but I need that deeper love where I am embraced with every fiber of the other person's being. I want skin on my skin and hands in my hair, lips pressed up against mine and heart beat mushed up to heart beat. And I want that hug that says "I love you" without the three words having to be spoken. Just hands that will hold me like I am composed of more than skin, bones and organs...that I have a soul and emotions and that my heart beats for them like the pulse in their hands race for me. And it's so "gay" (Palma), but I miss having the weight of another person on top of me. Not that I don't like having the better view on top, but there is something cozy about weight on top of me and I am being taken care of. Just hands and arms and skin and bones and kisses and words without words and love. I know I am capable of loving someone else so much...but...yeah.